Sisterly Support Part 1: Advice For Anyone Starting DBT
I’m here giving you some sibling love. I wanted to do a post detailing the advice I would have appreciated so much before starting and in my first few sessions of Dialectical Behavioural Therapy (DBT). I remember looking online and learning loosely what DBT was, but nothing helped ease my anxiety of what to expect and I struggled to find first-hand experiences.
I'm currently doing DBT and this is part 1 of what will grow into being my therapy series. In part 2 I'm honest about how I felt when I started. I've just had 2 newcomers join my group DBT, and I felt a lot of empathy when they discussed their discomfort about joining the group.
Before you even read any further I wanr you to acknowledge that you have made the first step. You've decided that you want to feel and operate better. That takes a lot, and it's not easy to come to that conclusion so be proud of yourself.
Try and go into your therapy with an open mind
I know it's easier said than done and our minds run wild with the ifs, buts, and maybes. Focus your attention on all the positive things that can come out of this by physically writing them out.
Voice how you feel about being new to the group
Every single person sitting in the room was once the newbie and in your position and can relate to how you're feeling. Your vulnerability can make you feel more comfortable about opening up, as well as starting conversations amongst the whole group.
Therapy will get better
Don't judge yourself if you feel in a heightened state and the first couple of sessions feel like a blur. You need time to adjust and soak in what is happening.
You know more skills than you know, I promise you
Some of the skills you will get taught are coping strategies that you already use but haven't put a name to.
For example, you went to the first session and decided that you weren't going to go back. But you boom you are there same time next week for the next session. You used a skill to get yourself back to therapy!
Look at the diary cards and worksheets as part of your therapy
Avoid separating them and defining the diary cards and worksheets as homework. (I know school wasn't everyone's favourite place so let's banish the word homework)
Fill out the diary cards daily
Filling in a week's worth 5 mins before a session is anxiety-provoking. Place it somewhere so bait that you can't ignore it even if you wanted to. Put it on the front of your fridge, on your mirror, your bathroom cabinet.
Get a journal and write about your week
Either hold on to your diary cards and organise them or buy a journal. In your journal, you can write about your week using your diary cards as a template. The proof in seeing how far you've come on your journey is documenting it and being able to look back.
Just turning up to the session is not going to help you
I'd probably tell you to f*** off if I'd been told this, but it really is what I needed, but definitely did not want to hear. *I'd expect my sister to be honest.*
Turning up to the sessions is a bold move but it is only the first step. You need to be fully present and engaged. Some days you'll need to constantly remind yourself why you originally chose to come to therapy because it is hard.
Have you found the advice useful? What else would you like this series to cover?