The Greater Freedom: Life As A Middle Eastern Woman Outside The Stereotypes
Alya Mooro
Genre: Non-Fiction
Publisher: Little a
Watch The Breakdown
The Greater Freedom- Life As A Middle Eastern Woman Outside The Stereotypes, is part memoir and part social exploration into the Middle Eastern society. Written by an Egyptian-born and London raised journalist. Let’s keep it all the way a hundred the Middle Eastern society gets a lot of news coverage on topics such as terrorism, extremism and oppression. Voice’s like Alya’s are powerful in ripping up stereotypes and making you challenge even yourself on unconscious prejudice thoughts.
Taboo subjects are covered and addressed throughout the book, with chapter titles breaking down the topic: When you learn how you’re supposed to look, When you’re supposed to be with an Arab, and When you’re not supposed to like sex. You get insider thoughts, feelings and experiences of a culture that like others is coloured in stereotypes. A real honest and personal account of the author’s experiences, and through research and loads of interviews, those of various other Middle Eastern women navigating their way through this thing we call life.
“Alya Mooro grew up between two cultures and felt a pull from both. Where could she turn for advice and inspiration when it seemed there was nobody else like her? Today, Mooro is determined to explore and explode the myth that she must identify either as ‘Western’ or as one of almost 400 million other ‘Arabs’ across the Middle East.”
Is that how you’re feeling yeah
This book was an easy and flowing read and I enjoyed the book. You could get away with calling it an autobiography, as, at the heart of the book, it’s about the author’s experiences. Keep that in your mind, if not it’s easy to think that some narratives have been completely overlooked.
The book is simplistic in the way that someone who has no Middle Eastern friends can learn and on the other end someone with a lot of Middle Eastern friends can feel at home in the book and still pick up some things.
The chapter breakdown itself is a good talking point starter. The content is written in a way that speaks to those who connect through experiences, those who need to see facts and figures and also the bibliography kings and queens out there. It’s clear that it’s written by someone who works in the media world, not good or bad, but an observation.
I’m not a newbie to the Arab world. I spend a lot of my time out in Tunisia with close friends who at this point have become family, so I wasn’t shocked by some of the examples that came up because I’d been shocked years ago when I first learned about them. For the most part, I’ve adjusted to them. Don’t get it twisted though, some I don’t agree with, and many I have questioned which has resulted in really interesting conversations with friends. We don’t do this enough, asking questions. I don’t know if it’s out of fear, being too “British”, or maybe being bland and not inquisitive, I don’t know… but I think it’s important to ask questions.
In this 2019-2020 “funny tolerance” world, Alya could have thrown out all the amazing things about being Arab and her experiences, playing it safe and ending it there but she didn’t. She was real, raw and nothing was held back. I truly got the good, the bad and the ugly and ultimately that’s what was memorable! This book is all about learning about a culture and society from an insider - Not someone who had dipped into it, a scholar, or an observer. A real, this is and has been my life narrative. Her efforts are admirable and as Toni Morrison famously said: “If there's a book that you want to read, but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it.”
One thing I did take away from the book is how liberal my close friend’s family are compared to many Arab families, similar to the author Alya’s immediate family.
It hit me when
One of the women interviewed talked about authority and how until you were married you were under the authority of your father. And then when you got married, you were effectively swapping your father’s rules to the rules of your husband and it left me with chills. I’m not naive, this is not a Middle Eastern specific issue, but to read how often more than not this was the case threw up all types of red flags in my vision.
“Ultimately, my dad allowing me to be myself is what allows me to be myself. That is a humbling realisation. That even where I am free to live by my life by my own rules, it was still a man - still my father - who was the gatekeeper to my freedom.”
3 Interesting Facts From the Book
In Egypt, if a man has sex with a prostitute and gets caught, the woman is put on trial and the man has to testify against her. The woman is then imprisoned.
Divorced mothers in Jordan are not allowed to remarry and must be judged to be trustworthy and ‘able to perform their duties’
In Saudi Arabia, women throwing parties to celebrate divorces are on the rise.
True stories
One topic that came up constantly throughout the book is the power and hold of opinions of those in the community. The judgement and fear of it. Since our friendship started back in 2012/2013 I’ve always invited my homegirl Rah to visit England as a holiday and stay with me. She always said “inshallah” but I realised over time that it probably wasn’t going to happen.
In about 2015/2016 her parents greenlit the trip, and to be honest, it was all a bit of a blur. One conversation I always remember though was Rah telling me that her parents hadn’t mentioned the trip to family or friends, as opinions from the family would put a stop to her coming. And there was me jumping back and forth between Tunisia and England without any parental consent or input.
“Friends are like extended family and you always feel welcome in their houses and their parents are so generous”
The above quote reminded me of a memory. Summer 2016 I had been invited to a wedding in Tunisia. I sorted out my outfits in England and then flew to Tunisia. As soon as Rah and her mum picked me up Rah’s mum was on a mission to get to the tailors. I wanted to catch a nap, but I got dragged along for the outing. Rah was getting some moderations to a dress, and I was just trying to stay awake. Anyway, Mumma signals for me to go to the tailor and I’m baffled.
Turns out Mumma had bought me, Rah and her sister Rym matching material in different colours to get dresses custom made for the wedding. For her “3 daughters,” she said. Yoo, I felt so loved. There are countless times I’ve been made to feel like a family member out in Tunisia.
Seasoning Level
CO2 | Salt | Pepper | Mixed Herbs | All Purpose Seasoning
Big Quote
“To be free, we first have to be able to name our constraints and the ways we are held back from exploring our identities and from expressing our truest selves”
Before you open this book take out your phone or a notebook and write down what comes to your mind when you think of Arab women. It’s not a test or a trick, it’s just for you. Then read the book and come back to your initial thoughts, and reflect on them.
